(First, welcome to any visitor’s from Annie’s Blog! I’m honored that you stopped by.)
Tomorrow’s the end of the month. Where in the world did July go?? I’m not gonna lie, I am not looking forward to tomorrow. Wanna know why? End of the month weigh-in. I took a peek at the scale yesterday, and it was not exciting news. I am afraid of getting on that scale tomorrow and seeing 1) a gain or 2) the same weight I started with this month. Neither of those possibilities is ideal to me at all, and I do not like that all of a sudden, after months of feeling freedom from the scale and its power to sway my emotions, I am dreading a weigh-in.
When I first started this weight loss journey, I weighed myself every day, sometimes multiple times a day. I was obsessed with seeing the number on that scale go down, and if it did, then my day was blissful! Seeing a loss was as good as eating a piece of chocolate, so great was the boost in my mood. But if I didn’t see a loss, my day was ruined (and I weighed first thing in the morning, so that’s a lot of ruined hours). I went through the whole day feeling miserable and analyzing everything I had done the previous day, trying to figure out why I had gained weight. It was torturous!
So back in January, I decided to scale back with my weigh ins (excuse the horrendous pun). I started out by going a week between weigh-ins, and then I tried 2 weeks, and it was great! I lost weight, I felt better about myself, and I wasn’t constantly think about that little number on the scale! The early months of the year continued in this way, and yet here I find myself revisiting old territory.
I have to remember that I am MORE than a number on the scale. I am a daughter of the Most High God, and He DELIGHTS in me! ME. Just as I am. God is far more concerned with how I am doing in my relationship with him than how I am doing with weight loss. And yet if I make an idol out of the scale, then that too affects my relationship with God. One thing I never counted on is just how spiritual this whole journey is, and every time I allow negativity and apathy and gluttony to reign, I am letting the enemy win and showing that I don’t believe that God is who He says He is. I want to believe. I choose God’s truth over the power of the scale. I choose to be thankful for who I am BEYOND what the scale says, for all I’ve been given that has nothing to do with what I weigh. I choose to be grateful for a husband who found me beautiful at 261 pounds and finds me beautiful today.
One of my favorite verses is Galatians 5:1 which says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” I will not be a slave to the scale. I choose freedom. What about you?